He Said/She Said - Porn Sex

He Said

I assume that the last part of this question would read "to girls," to which I'd say yes we understand, and no it doesn't really matter.  That's like asking if guys understand that riding a roller coaster isn't as much fun for the roller coaster:  Of course it isn't, but if a guy is treating you like a carnival ride, your level of pleasure isn't high on his priority list – he's not trying to woo you, he's just trying to do you (in which case what looks good is what feels good). 

Now before you fire off that angry hate mail, allow me to clarify two things.  One, I'm not describing all sex as pure objectification, but pornography, by definition, is exactly that.  And two, it works both ways:  when a girl is pulling moves on you that Jenna Jameson demands extra pay to perform, there's a noticeable emotional disconnect that establishes to the guy that he is nothing more to her than a quick ride around Splash Mountain.   

That said, guys are the guiltier partyBut these  number of women who objectify men pales in comparison to the number of men who are having sex just because it looks good, and this can be attributed to basic biology:  guys need something to look at, girls need something to feel.  Fulfilling these needs is the reason guys like the idea of porn (read: meaningless, carefree sex with impossibly perfect women) and girls like the idea of an entire saga dedicated to an impossibly perfect glittering vampire who has no desire whatsoever to sink his teeth (or anything else for that matter) into a girl who clearly wants all kinds of things sunk into her.  Pardon the broad-stroke generalization – I'm sure there are exceptions – but this being the universal norm, I think it's safe to say that yes, guys understand that duplicating hardcore porn with women who aren't actually hardcore porn stars isn't going to be nearly as fun for the girl.  We hope so, sure, but anything you have to ask a girl to do more than three times before she accepts probably wasn't on her bucket list in the first place

Good sex, on the other hand, is all about understanding and balance.  So for the five to ten minutes a girl has to endure the most ludicrous, uncomfortable and degrading porn-inspired acrobatics to satisfy her man's fantasies, she should understand that the guy must succumb to trained and completely unnatural dating rituals for hours on end to satisfy hers – and not just in a discreet private sanctum, but in full view of all his peers.   

She Said

First and foremost, I'd like to make it very clear how I feel about this question: Porn is acting, it has nothing at all to do with real life, because it is make believe. You simply can not compare commercial porn to real life sex, in any way. 

That being said, porn is a tricky subject for girls, and most of the time unnecessarily taboo. I will be the first to admit that I most definitely have not watched as much porn as the average male, or even the average 14 year old boy, but I have watched my fair share. Porn seems to be constantly misjudged as something only for guys to masturbate to because it achieves some fantasy they will otherwise never see in real life. This is false. 

Yes, guys do generally assume that the way sex is performed in porn looks good but doesn't feel good for girls, but that's because the main goal of generic commercial porn is to get the viewer to achieve orgasm; and of course, the majority of those viewers are male. However, I happen to know that achieving "porn-stardom" in the bedroom, with that significant other, does not have to involve discomfort and emotional disconnect. I strongly believe that with the right communication and trust, pulling off sexual positions like a "reverse cow-girl" or even the "folded deck chair" can be pleasurable for both parties involved. 

Women do not save the "nasty" moves in bed for a shallow, selfish routine they won't enjoy themselves. If a guy goes into sex like a shallow dullard, she will treat him like one, giving him her disconnected Jenna Jameson moves, and forced, artificial moaning which can result in no fun for anyone. If however, he treats her as someone special, someone significant, she will give him the moves that Jenna Jameson uses at home with her real lovers. Even women who lack sexual experience will bring out their inner porn star with a guy they share a special connection with. Deep down, most women are eager to please, get off on pleasing, and are subconsciously reacting to the guy's attitude. Make her feel like the world and she will rock yours.